Saturday, May 15, 2010

What I learned this week...

I'm glad to be able to say this week is over!  It was a long week and it had several VERY trying moments.  It was all I could do not to cry some of the times, and some others that's exactly what I did.  I was starting to wonder if this last week would ever come to end.

But now here I sit at the end of the week, and I look back and I guess it wasn't really all that bad (or I'm just telling myself to keep my sanity).  I can honestly say that it put my patience, strength, understanding, and acceptance to the test.  My strength as a mother was put to the test, and what I was willing to endure for Sara's best interests.  I was forced to use my patience to their very limits with a certain individual, and I learned a new way of understanding people.

Through it all I have learned a new level of acceptance.  I've never been good at this part since I have always managed to find a way to work the situation to my advantage, and manipulate it into something I can live with.  That wasn't a choice for either of my problems this week, so I had to face the hard fact that I just have to accept it.

And as I sit her now I just keep remembering that old saying that I have no idea where it comes from, but it is one of the most important things to remember.

Grant me the strength to change the things I cannot accept,
To accept the things I cannot change,
And the wisdom to know the difference!

I think that this week was to remind me of how to tell the difference.  I started out trying to figure out how to change things, but eventually had to accept that I couldn't.  I learned some hard lessons, and I hope that I can continue to remain strong as these problems continue to develop.  Maybe at some point it will be something I can then work on to change, but for now I am forced to have acceptance. 

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